Many human afflictions have plain names and fancy names. For instance, swelling is the plain name and edema is the fancy name. Itching is the plain name and pruritus is the fancy name. Greed is the plain name and unenlightened self-interest is the fancy name. Bedwetting is the plain name and… well, I should stop there.
The philosophy of enlightened self-interest maintains that “persons who act to further the interests of others … ultimately serve their own self-interest.” The unenlightened version goes something like this: “Persons who fail to further their own interests ultimately lose out to those who do.” Friends, welcome to our unenlightened world.
A classic example of unenlightened self-interest is found in the alcoholic beverage laws of the various states. I was recently (and not for the first time) reminded of these laws when I went to purchase a bottle of wine at my local supermarket, along with other items for a dinner my wife was preparing for an ailing neighbor. It was a Sunday morning, 11:48 am. In North Carolina, you cannot buy wine or beer on Sunday until noon, so I had to kill time in the store before I could check out and go home.
What was the point? What moral or legal principle did I respect by waiting ten minutes to buy a bottle of wine? None that I see, and I think most people would agree, this is absurd. That being the case, why do such logic-defying laws remain on the books? Look no further than unenlightened self-interest.
The table below shows where various alcoholic beverages may be sold, for the three states I have lived in over the past sixty-odd years. Each has its own odd restrictions:
| STATE | BEER | WINE | LIQUOR |
| New York | Grocery Stores | Wine Stores Liquor Stores |
Liquor Stores |
| North Carolina | Grocery Stores Taverns |
Grocery Stores Wine Stores |
State Stores |
| Pennsylvania | Distributors Taverns |
State Stores | State Stores |
Of these, Pennsylvania has the most restrictive rules on alcohol sales, New York the least. It must be because Pennsylvania drinkers are the most wanton and depraved, compared to those in neighboring states. There can be no doubt that thirsty Pennsylvania drinkers, if they were to be provided more convenient ways to buy the beer, wine and spirits of their choice, would pour out onto their potholed streets in a Walking Dead-style rampage, lurching from one establishment to the next and drinking the state dry, one case at a time. No choice, then, but for the state government to step in and protect Pennsylvanians from themselves. Drunken sots, the lot of them.¹
It might seem that New Yorkers (who drink 2.17 gallons of ethanol per person per year) and North Carolinians (2.05 gallons) are not all that more sober than Pennsylvanians (2.26 gallons) and therefore warrant similar restrictions on alcohol sales. But that would involve logic — and we can’t have any of that running loose, not when money is involved.
The perverse world of alcohol regulation was brought to the forefront just last week when the Pennsylvania Liquor Control Board decided to relax its rules on beer sales. Previously, a distributor (think drive-thru beverage depot) could only sell beer by the case, but thanks to the PLCB’s highly controversial decision, it may now sell 12-packs and 18-packs as well.
Pennsylvania’s thousand-plus beer distributors are happy enough. The Malt Beverage Distributors Association of Pennsylvania (MBDAPA), the lobbyist for distributors, is crowing about its accomplishments on its website:
- Secured 12-pack sales for beer distributors, the most significant package reform in 75 years, through MBDA’s concerted legal efforts with the PA LCB.
- Without MBDA’s concerted opposition, there would be thousands of non-specialty retailers selling case beer from the aisles today.
- Stopped the Governor’s proposal for issuing thousands of new beer selling licenses.
- Secured passage of the Quota Law to ensure the value of your license.
- Defeated repeated legislative liquor reform efforts that would have raised prices, decreased selection and lowered the value of your licenses.
Note the words: secured, opposition, stopped, ensured, defeated. These are words that describe the successful defending of one’s turf. Such words were not chosen casually. They tell a victory story as thrilling and inspiring as that of the Alamo — where thousands of non-specialty retailers were prevented from selling beer from its adobe-lined aisles.
Distributors may be happy, but tavern owners are not. The President of the Pennsylvania Licensed Beverage & Tavern Association — the tavern lobby — does not have much to tout but still sees this as a good time to pass around the tip jar:
As President of this hard-working association, I am asking for your help with our political action committee (PAC) fund. Even if you are not a member of the Association, you can still help us to protect YOUR BUSINESS by contributing to this fund so that we can help our friends in the State Legislature. These friends are the men and women on Capitol Hill that stand up for your rights and refuse to cast votes that will hurt you, they introduce bills that will help you grow your business, and they refuse to bow down to demands that take away from the value of your license.
If there were a Guild of United Lubricated Pennsylvanians (GULP), it might well ask: “What about us? How are we drinkers best served by monopolistic practices and political protections?” But not to worry, there is no such guild. Those voices can cry in their beer.
This is the plain reality in Pennsylvania, New York, North Carolina and all the other states of this union. The reason change is so hard, on both national and state levels, is because every law and regulation is ultimately about crowning financial winners and losers, and no one will abide being on the losing side.
It would take an article ten times this length to list and describe all the vested interests involved in the sale of alcholic beverages. That each state has its own peculiar stance on alcohol sales is plainly a legacy effect, preserving interests that prevailed in 1933 when Prohibition was repealed² and baked in by decades of dollar flows since. The only logic behind our present-day restrictions comes straight from the Bible: “Whoever has will be given more; whoever does not have, even what they have will be taken from them.”³
The politics of today — Bernie Sanders and Elizabeth Warren notwithstanding — is not about dispensing justice but directing cash flows. Corporations and unions have their spokespersons, lobbyists and dollars, but citizens have… their ever-diminishing right to vote for the big-money advocate of their choice, after consulting their unenlightened self-interest and whatever passes these days for a conscience.
So here’s to us. Drink up.
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The Tennessee county in which Jack Daniel’s is produced is dry.